I always enjoy Springtime when the buds come out on trees and bulbs push their way up through the dirt to burst into colorful blooms. It is life affirming to me. Hopeful. There is a plan that all of nature follows. Year after year. It reminds me that a higher power than ourselves is keeping everything on course.
This year, Spring made itself known early. We’ve already had daffodils, tulip trees, forsythia, red buds, and this week, dogwoods, blooming. But I’ve been distracted by events happening hundreds of miles away in an ICU in a medical center in Iowa.
Since January 14th, my 35 year-old nephew has been battling against horrific odds to stay alive. He was admitted with pancreatitis and diagnosed with SUD. For those of you non-medical people, like me, that means Substance Use Disorder. His substance is alcohol. The same demon that plagued his father.
This 8 week ICU stay has included fourteen surgeries: complete removal of his colon (large intestine); removal of part of his pancreas; and removal of part of his small intestine resulting in an ileostomy. There have been dozens of units of blood, clotting factor, and plasma given. Heroic efforts have been made to stop his internal bleeding and to close and mange the incision in some fashion, difficult to do after so many times into the same incision. He ran dramatically high levels of lactic acid. Has been on tube feedings. Has had IV blood pressure support and dialysis to stay alive. He was intubated for an extended time resulting in damage to his vocal cords making him unable to speak. He was on a ventilator to assist his breathing for awhile and had a tracheostomy placed to support the ventilator use, also for comfort and to give his vocal cords some relief from having a tube down his throat. Then when things seemed to be improving they discovered he had a super-bug that would require a strong antibiotic to combat. He has been blessed with extraordinarily talented surgeons and medical staff.
His wife and mother (A PhD Nurse Practitioner) have lived at his bedside as much as possible. (His wife has had to go to work and care for their 12 year old and two 8 year olds). They have kept over four hundred people “in the loop” on his daily situation through a marvelous site called Caring Bridge. It was set up specifically for families needing to update friends and loved ones during a medical crisis in a secure, private way. It is a free service that depends upon donations to continue their wonderful work. Because of this link, people literally around the world have been able to share their prayers and love to strengthen my nephew, my sister, and their family.
So why am I sharing this story with you? There are several reasons:
If you are a substance user who can’t stop, whether it is alcohol or something else—please get help. Please don’t let it get to the point my nephew did. Look to Alcoholics Anonymous, your personal physician, Google your substance of choice and find out where to get help in your area. You aren’t only harming yourself. You are hurting your family, your friends. No one can make you stop. No one can force you to get treatment. You have to step up and recognize your personal responsibilities and treat your disease (SUD). I don’t want anyone to go through what my nephew is. He wants to live. He has a strong will to go forward. I wish he had reached out for help, rather than trying to go it on his own, and getting into a life-threatening situation. Protect yourself.
If someone you love has a substance use disorder disease, support them in their struggle and encourage them to find help. Knowing they are loved can only help.
If you are a blood donor, God Bless you. In large part because of blood donors my nephew has made it this far. If you’ve never donated blood or plasma, think about it. It is truly a life giving gift.
If you have a family member in a medical crisis, look at www.caringbridge.org. They do amazing work. With one post you can securely communicate with everyone at a time when you’re too exhausted mentally and physically to keep telling the story over and over.
I believe my nephew has been blessed with countless miracles during this hospitalization because there is a strong wave of prayer constantly going to ask God for strength, for healing, and for peace. I don’t know what the destination at the end of his journey will be. Make no mistake, there is still a long road to recovery or he could leave us tomorrow despite everything. I do know that God has held him close, wrapped him in love, and given wisdom and compassion to his caregivers. My prayer is that everyone involved in these daily miracles will recognize that God is good and He has a plan for my nephew that only He knows. Thanks to all of you who have been praying for my nephew and who have been holding my sister and her husband, my nephew’s wife and children, and me up with your loving prayers.
So as Spring brings nature’s renewal to us, I continue to hope and pray for strength for the days ahead for my nephew and all his family.